walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize