lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
We have started to decorate penises.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
