No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
