What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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