Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
