if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
