only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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