he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Randomize