i just sent this text using only my big toe
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
