so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
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