i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize