used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
