After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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