Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
