Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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