The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I'm passing your future prison.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
