At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
