I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize