2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize