i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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