I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Drake has all the answers
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
