i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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