fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize