another moral hangover. fuck.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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