And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Randomize
