It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
