when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
smell my finger.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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