we should wear snuggies to the strip club
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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