I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Your dad touched me again.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
