And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
