Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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