Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
