he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
