what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
