3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I will pee on everything he values.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
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