just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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