He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
how does that bad decision feel?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
