It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
