had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
