I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
