My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
