His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Randomize
