Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
