One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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