She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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