Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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