When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
you had me at cake vodka
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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