i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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