I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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