i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
