I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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