wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Randomize
